01 May 2002

The Need To Be Needed

Father, I willingly offered to help Anne when she was in a tight financial situation. However, instead of being appreciative, she blew up at me in public, accusing me of being condescending towards her. A few months later, I invited her family out for lunch. This time round, she hesitated instead of jovially accepting my invitation as she normally would have. I just couldn't take it any more, called the treat off, and walked away feeling terribly sore. Since then, our relationship has been rather cool, not like this before. I want to be freed from such feelings and behaviour...but Father, HOW?

Why do I feel so rejected when someone declines to accept what I offer freely? Why must they "tarik harga"? I don't want anything in return...but wait a minute...if that is true, then why do I feel so hurt when the other party actually says "No"? Doesn't Anne have a right to say "Yes" or "No" to me? Lord, please help me to understand myself first before I blame others for my infirmities. Show me why I need to be needed and heal me as You see fit, I pray.

For Meditation and Prayer:
Isaiah 53:4; Ephesians 4:29-5:2